Hello, I have approximatly 34 minuites untill I need to go catch my bus (that's fast maths for someone who failed their maths gcse twice, shh) so here I am writing nonsence for you lovely people. I could have wasted my time on skype but my internet is being very slow for me today, so I would have just sounded like 'MHHRF...MEEP...FRHHINBHVGLIGFTDNJJ...' and no one wants that.
I speak really oddly in these posts, you Mr/Ms Reader must think me some sort of purley queen because the tone of voice thats in my head as I write this in is one that resembles Russell Brand :/ Don't ask me why... Irl I just sound like a toddler who's just awoken from a skip.
I know some lovely people over the internet, and the more I'm on here the closer I get to them which is great, I find it so much easier to communicate through text. If I make myself look stupid I can just sign off and wallow in my retardedness,but in a real life social situation I can't just walk away and never see that person again so I get scared of what to say. I only seem to be able to be normal around people I know really well.
This is getting deeper than I expected it to be.
I'm really shy and quiet and I wish I wasn't, i wish i could just say what I want and run around and still feel I have peoples aproval. I know you will say 'Oh you shouldnt need peoples aproval, I'm sure they like you, you shouldnt care, just be yourself' and I know all that, but whenever I'm in a social situation my mind just goes blank, I never know the right thing to say.
I don't know what I can do to change this, It's like I'm stuck with this mindset and social awkwardness and I can't escape.
I don't know whether I should post this...
Okay I will, but only so Lawrence can find out how retarded I am :)